Actually, it’s not really a secret, seeing as I have told my friends, my family, and even my boyfriend-who approves, by the way, although I’m not sure he actually knows the full extent of my lust for my crush.

At first it started with little glances, a stolen peek here and there, nothing to be alarmed about, nothing to raise any suspicions. Even I didn’t know that it was anything more than a passing fancy, something to ponder in the back of my mind. But it is quite obvious to me now that my little idea has quickly progressed into a full-scale obsession, occupying my mind and distracting me when I should be doing other important things, like paying attention to the road as I drive.

You see, I have a crush on the Mazda3 Sport. I can’t explain when it happened, I can’t explain why it happened, I can only accept that I want what I want and I want that car. When I see one pass by on the street my eyes are immediately drawn to it and I can’t help but watch it from afar, coveting what I cannot yet have. I get a little giddy every time I see that distinctive shape (although there is another car that has fooled me once or twice, but that was back in the early days of my crush before my mind had become fully honed in on every line of the car). I’m sure that if I could remember my dreams they would be filled with speedy little Mazdas, and me inside of them.

I haven’t told my current car about my new crush, I thought that might be a bit too cruel, but I think it can sense that perhaps my attentions have been diverted, since it has been putting on its little “I won’t start, please give me attention” routine a little more often lately. I just have to find the right time to tell it. Or perhaps I will take the easy way out and let it leave me, so that I can assuage my guilt at cheating on it.

Zoom zoom.

stupid pet owners